lox and cream cheese tartines

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Let's talk real for a second. Sometimes, as much as we all need to be ourselves and be authentic and you know what I mean... once in a while someone comes along and you find yourself in a pickle. You feel the need to try and impress them. There is not a bone in your body that can stop you from wanting to prove that you are better than they're giving you credit for. Like, for example, if a snooty acquaintance says, "So what do you do all day as a stay at home mom?" - you just have to hit them back with "Oh, I volunteer at an animal hospital for six hours a day with my four children. What do you do?" Irregardless of whether or not that's true is beside the point. Sometimes you just have to say what people need to hear.

The only problem is that it's not always possible to fake the time and energy it will take to impress, especially when it comes to entertaining. You can't just pretend you want to bake crème brûlée for a party after a full day with the kids and then find it magically brûléed on your counter. So this is when you need to start serving "tartines". Serving them as well as talking about them. "Oh, I'm serving tartines tonight for the guests - I'll see you at eight o'clock." But really, you're serving toast. Literally, tartines are just toast. But serve that toast on a white platter with lox and schmear and suddenly you are the queen of tartines. Your party will be a hit and people will feel the need to start impressing you. 

 

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lox and cream cheese tartines

pumpernickel bread loaf, or your bread of choice (sliced makes it faster!)
cream cheese
roma tomatoes
cucumbers
red onion
lox
capers 

toast the slices of bread. spread cream cheese and add lox, thin slices of tomatoes, cucumbers, and red onions. garnish with capers and begin referring to them as tartines. 
 

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